People You Never Expect.

I feel like everyone, somewhere out there has heard of someone who has lost their parent when they were a teenager, whether it was your friend when you were 15, or some kid you knew from your soccer team.

Although, many of my friends seemed to try and be there for me, they really weren't. But, I was 16 and I wasn't about to go blame my friends for not helping me deal with this tragedy.

The day my father passed, I knew my life was completely different. While all my friends were worried about getting their first car, or their first kiss, I was wondering when this heart ache would end. I felt really alone. I had some friends be there for me, by making me dinner or cookies, while others wouldn't even message me.

I remember, even being in class, 2 weeks after my dad died. My one friend didn't even say anything to me, except "Hey". As if, "Hey, there you are, where were you?"

Oh you know, its not like I was just dealing with the most complicated feelings in the world.

I think the weird thing with grief is, you always expect those you love to notice your loneliness, and depression, but really..its the ones you didn't expect. I remember being in grade 11 health class, we were talking about parents..and more specifically: dads. I remember I felt a little bit uncomfortable, but not major. Enough for me to be like "Not this again."

This one girl in my class, who I have known since grade 7 must've saw something, because she asked me if I wanted to leave the classroom and if I was OK. Honestly, I was shocked. I really wasn't bothered, but why I have never forgot this moment was probably because, she wasn't someone I would expect to ask me if I was doing alright. I never thanked her, and its been 5 years since then, I feel like she probably doesn't even remember that day, but honestly she kind of saved my life.

I started noticing this more and more as I grew older. People I wasn't really close to, seemed to be more close to me, than my own high school friends. I don't really blame my then friends, because we were all 15 & 16 when this happened, and its not like they knew how to handle it.. but I still find it kind of funny, that those who were my friends, never even asked me, if I was doing alright.

As time goes on, I've just learned to shove this down my heart. Some people, just will never ask if you're doing alright, meanwhile, some kid you hardly know will ask if you're doing alright, And to be honest, it feels kinda great to be asked, if I am doing alright. Like maybe someone out there, actually does care.